Here we go guys, I’m off on a whole new adventure and I’m scared out of my mind. The first stop I’m heading to is Bogota, Colombia—my first Latin American city. I was so ecstatic about going to Colombia at first, but now I can’t stop being so worrisome about it. The past few weeks leading to this, everyone sort of ruined the exciting anticipation for me. I’ve been hearing nothing but ‘bring back cocaine,’ ‘don’t run into cartels,’ ‘well, it was nice knowing you,’ and ‘I hope you come back with all your body parts.’
I don’t know about this one guys… I’m terrified. I’m super excited about exploring a new country, but also super anxious. I don’t think I’ve ever had this much anxiety about going to a new country since visiting Kiev, Ukraine during the Revolution back in December 2013. Even so, Kiev was just an extended layover trip… Colombia is a one-way exploration… solo exploration. I know only a couple friends in Bogota, have no plans on what I’m doing or where I’m going and most importantly, I DO NOT speak Spanish. SO! If there’s anyone out there that’s crazy enough to just pack up and come along for the ride, please come and keep me in good company—especially if you speak Spanish.
Right now, I’m couple thousands feet up in the air in the middle of Mexico and flying first class with a glass of cheap airline whiskey in my hand (you’d think they’d give you at least a quality brand for the amount you pay for first class, but NOPE!). I can’t tell if I’m tipsy, tired as fuck, still anxious or all of the above. All I know is that wherever I may be flying over at the moment, it is absolutely breathtaking. See for yourself:
Anyways, I suppose the root of my anxiety is due to the lack of outlet for my emotions that have built up inside of me for months. Writing had always helped, but I really haven’t written anything since work picked up, and a lot has happened in the past few months. I cannot disclose, but let’s just say that this girl has come across many fork in the road, but has had no courage to step forth in any one direction.
This week, I’ve had so many restless nights thinking about going away for so long to Colombia. Travel has always been my escape, but this time around, I see this trip being more of a challenge than anything. Not a challenge of facing a new environment—that’s the exciting part—but more so the challenges I have to face when I return. Travel has always allowed me to step outside of my own reality, but now I see that only cowards run away from reality and that’s what I am doing… I am a coward… and I suppose, drunk.
Besides the melodrama, I do feel a lot of happiness about this trip. For one, I’m so fucking happy that I’m not sitting in economy for this long ass 10 hour ride. But secondly, I’m just happy to finally do what makes me feel the most like myself: traveling solo. This year my boyfriend has really spoiled me with such amazing first class and luxury resort kind of travel that I almost forgot what it was like to just take the road to myself—just kidding, I can never forget the thrill of traveling solo. I just really needed some spontaneous roughed up travel adventures. No plans, no worries.
I guess within all of the anxiety, the true emotions of excitement and happiness are finally coming out as I’m writing this. I cannot wait to share with all of you guys my crazy adventures to come in the next few weeks in Colombia. Perhaps there will be some tears, maybe some drama, but I’m truly just hoping for an amazing adventure and to return home safe and sound. Stay tuned guys, I’ll be making sure to keep everyone posted as often as possible!
xoxo from Up in the Air,